Am I Ready to Change? How I’m Using Motivational Interviewing to Find Out
In my previous post, I laid out some important reasons why sleep should be your number 1 priority when it comes to your health. But I’ve got a dirty secret. I continued to make edits and work on that post well into midnight, and subsequently woke up the next morning feeling 1 part exhausted and 2 parts a hypocrite.
I KNOW how important sleep is. And, I even know what helps me to sleep better. Yet, I continue to sacrifice my own sleep, frequently. Clearly, I haven’t been ready to change.
Are You Ready?
Being in a career field where I help people to solve problems and work towards change, I know what commitment to change looks like, and I know what resistance to change looks like.
In psychology, there’s an approach to supporting individuals through making behavioral changes in their lives, known as Motivational Interviewing (MI). I’ve learned to incorporate principles of this approach into my own work with my patients.
MI is so helpful in clinical work because it reminds us to step back and think about where our patients are at in their awareness of the need for change, the limitations they’re concerned about, and their desires to move forward. There will be nothing but friction if someone is not ready to change.
Change Talk
One of the pillars of Motivational Interviewing is to identify “change talk.” This comes in several forms, which are conveniently arranged in the acronym DARN CATS. I’ve spent the past several years learning to listen for DARN CATS in my patients in order to support their goal setting and recognize when they’re ready for the next steps towards change. It just recently hit me that I could be using these principles for myself.
I say over and over “I want to do better with my sleep,” but then continue to have nights where I’ve let hours of sleep go to waste in substitution for something less important. So, I’m going to publicly explore where I’m at on the continuum of readiness to change, and motivational interview myself to change my own behaviors. This may get weird…
Hiking and Leveling Up
Let’s use a hiking analogy. The end goal of motivational interviewing is to help someone to change their behavior. We can think of summiting a mountain as the change in behavior. Summiting a mountain, your elevation has changed, your view has changed, your mood has probably changed… You’ve leveled up.
Unless you’re constantly training and hiking, you don’t usually go from thinking about a hike to summiting it in the same day. You have to prepare thoroughly for the hike and turn it into a mental reality. Then you have to actually commit, get yourself to the trailhead, and begin the upward journey.
You’re not guaranteed to make it to the summit just because you’ve started the hike, either. You could bail at any point or you could run into unexpected elements or events that alter your plan. It takes commitment and flexibility to arrive at your ultimate goal, even if that means changing the planned path.
DARN CATS: That Darn Prep Work
DARN is made up of “preparatory change talk,” meaning someone is getting ready to, and expresses interest in changing, but they’re still just getting started. Think of it like the decision-making, planning, packing and equipment gathering before a big hike. DARN is made up of desire, ability, reasoning, and need. You don’t have to be thinking or saying something that fits into each category to be ready to change.
- SLEEP: “I WANT to get better at sleeping.”
- HIKE: “I’d like to go on a hike.”
- SLEEP: “I COULD sleep better, because I already know a lot of the strategies to improve my sleep.”
- HIKE: “I think I’ve found a hike that I could probably successfully summit.”
- SLEEP: “I SHOULD sleep better, because sleep deprivation hurts my productivity and health.”
- HIKE: “I should be able to do this hike on x day at x time in x hours.”
- SLEEP: “I NEED to start winding down before bed with an enjoyable routine.”
- HIKE: “I need to buy the proper shoes, poles, etc. and pack enough water.”
DARN CATS: CAT-apulting You To the Summit
Now that you’ve fully prepared, the next step towards change is to actually commit. CATS is characterized by “mobilizing change talk.” You are committed and taking actions to prove you’re ready to move forward with change. Think of this like actually putting your plan into action and making steps towards the summit! CATS is made up of commitment, activation, and taking steps.
- SLEEP: “I’m tired of feeling fuzzy and I’m ready to make sleeping well a priority. I’ve told someone close to me about my goals so they can help me to stay committed and accountable.”
- HIKE: “I’ve locked in my hiking partner!”
- SLEEP: “I’ve showered, done a relaxing skincare regimen, meditated, and drank a cup of tea in bed as part of my enjoyable bedtime routine.”
- HIKE: “I’ve driven to the trailhead and met up with my hiking partner.”
- SLEEP: “I’m getting to sleep by 10pm for the first day!”
- HIKE: “I start up the mountain. I can see the summit in the distance!”
Turning Change Talk Into Action
If I’m taking an honest look inside, I know I’ve been hovering just before commitment. I may say some committing things, but my actions haven’t been fooling anyone. I’ve been stuck at the prep phase of my hike where I could bail without any real consequences. Where I’m at, I never lined up a hiking partner to potentially disappoint, and I definitely haven’t yet driven to the trailhead just to drive back home.
In doing this exercise to evaluate my own thoughts and actions has helped me. If you’re feeling frustrated, in a constant loop of wanting change but not being able to commit, ask yourself a few of these questions:
- From 1-10, how important is this to you?
- What are you willing to sacrifice?
- How ready are you to get started?
- What steps do you need to take?
- When could you start?
- What do you need to gather or plan?
- How will you stay committed?
- What is the first step?
Challenge Accepted
I’m personally feeling really committed. I have a plan, a first step, and a way to be held accountable. Just like a hard hike, I know it probably won’t be pretty, but every step upward is a step in the right direction! Let’s see how it goes.
I’d love to hear if you give this a try with habits in your own life. Tell us how you’re asking yourself, “Am I ready to change?”
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